Bald Move TV – Star Wars Holiday Special: The Podcast

Merry Christmas, everybody! The last day of our Culkin Keatmas is upon us, and with it, our final gift to you.  Jim and I break down the Star Wars Holiday Special and take it for all it’s worth.  Wookiee porn, deeply unfunny instructional videos, ill-fitting helmets, and hours of uncaptioned Wookiee dialog are considered and de-coded but we’re still left with the big question… Why?  Since all involved have disowned the project we may never know.  But whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Life Day or any other tradition that aims to turn the coldest, darkest part of the year into something more, you are in our thoughts, and you have our gratitude for all the love and support you’ve shown us this past year.  We’ll see you in 2018!

Premium

Star Wars Holiday Special – LIVEWATCH!

That’s right, you saw the title.  For this years Merry Culkin Keatmas grand finale, we watch the infamous Star Wars Holiday Special.  Thrill as the Wookie homeworld of Kashyyyk is blockaided by sinister Imperial forces that stand between Chewbacca and his family celebrating Life Day.  Honestly, that description I just typed is 1000% cooler than the awful reality; Star Wars providing a thin vinear attempting to cover that most awful of television traditions; the variety show.

Bald Movies – Batman Returns (1992)

Our Merry Culkin Keatmas jingles on!  We’ve seen the apex of any good Keatmas, Batman Returns, the 1992 follow up to the Tim Burton Batman.  What’s better than Jack Nicholson as the Joker?  Having two classic Bat Villains.  The concept has merit, but the execution?  It’s not as purrrrfect as Catwoman might want.  We discuss Keaton’s place in the Bat Pantheon, Devito’s bizarre, grotesque, Penguin, and the stuff that works in the Catwoman/Batman relationship, and the stuff that doesn’t.   Stay tuned because we’re not quite done, you have one more present left to unwrap!  Come back Christmas Eve (Sunday, December 24th)  to find it under the tree!

Premium

Bald Movies – Home Alone (1990)

Merry Culkin Keatmas!  This is of course our follow up podcast to the LiveWatch of Home Alone, in which we take issue with our old pal Roger Ebert’s dour review of the film, trade trivia about the film, and in general talk about why it’s one of our very favorite Christmas films.  We’re not done!  Not by a long shot.  Come back next week as we put the Keaton back in Keatmas with Batman Returns!

Bald Movies – Jack Frost (1998)

The Merry Culkin Keatmas rages on with our podcast that brings the Keaton to Keatmas, 1998’s box office bomb, Jack Frost.  The film isn’t great, but we managed to extract a surprising amount of fun and holiday cheer from it.  Enjoy!  And don’t forget Lunch coming this Friday!  Next week we’ll tackle Home Alone with both LiveWatch and podcast.  See you then!

Premium

Jack Frost (1998) – LIVEWATCH

The first present of our Merry Culkin Keatmas Christmas celebration has been opened!  Sit back and sync up our Live Watch commentary with your copy of the ill conceived and ill fated 1998 Michael Keaton / horrifying snowman puppet / CGI monstrosity Jack Frost!  See if you can spot the Robert Baratheon cameo before we do!  Can you solve the mystery of the woman who against all evidence is not actually Elizabeth Shue?  Thrill to us trying to decipher the dialog of Charlie “the Brain” Frost’s marble-mouthed performance.  And have your heart warmed by a story featuring a boy who loses his father on Christmas — TWICE! — while we play to Grinch who picks the film apart!  And if Live Watches aren’t your thing, wait until Wednesday, when we release a podcast where we recap what we learned and took away from old Jack.